As I had always anticipated, medicine has turned out to be an all-consuming reality; a fact that had deterred me from it initially. The people I most often see day to day are associated with hospitals, the tasks that plague my never-ending to-do list are medically related and, most sickeningly, when I'm out on social dates with my friends (all of whom are unfortunately also in the medical field) the topic of conversation that eventually creeps up and takes over is, of course, medicine.
And in the midst of this inescapable, personality/individuality-sucking medical black-hole, my head screams, "How did I get here? I am not this person!"
For certain, I am not.
And five years ago, I most certainly did not envision myself where I am today.
I was an ever-curious and adventurous child; my favourite activities being reading, arts and craft, experimenting, exploring and treasure hunts. I was also very active and I loved swimming, swinging, and just about anything that involved running around and expanding energy.
Twenty years later, I'm still this person. One could say (and many have) that I really haven't grown up at all.
Throughout school and college, I always found my niche, and it always involved more than just academics.
In high school, it was music. I was the drummer-girl of a rock band with three other guys, and I loved it. That virtually sums up my memories of high school, although I'm fairly certain there were plenty of other things that kept me busy.
In college, it was foosball. I was dubbed 'The Foos Queen' by the boys on campus after winning first place in the A-levels tournament with the help of my infamous 'Kate-shot'.
Those were the days. I was young and carefree, and my only responsibility was towards self-development. And in all honesty? I feel I did a good job.
These days, I'm a final year medical student. One of many; but I love what I do.
I'm one of those lucky people who gets to wake up in the morning, go to work, and feel like I'm where I'm meant to be. I fit in, I belong, and I have a purpose that I feel capable of fulfilling. And that fulfils me.
If I had all the time in the world, I would publish my novels and non-fiction work, work on my art and sketches, record my musical albums, open my school of philosophy, and devote my time to the hundreds of other items on my non-medical to-do list that often gets neglected due to my more pressing medical priorities.
Medicine has not changed me. Not one iota.
However, out of necessity, my priorities have been reshuffled and it's easy to forget that there is another side of me that needs just as much nourishment as the medical side.
Self-care is something that is taught in most medical curriculums. After all, it's hard to care for others if you're having difficulty caring for yourself.
Often though, it's something that needs to actively be worked on as the work will steal your soul if you let it.
And a soulless doctor is no good to anyone.
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